301 to 310
Posted by sam wilson on Monday, March 3, 2014
BIOPUNK: Decades ago, our brains were infected by a linguistic virus. Now dormant, it can be reactivated by the phrase “Dashing and Daring…”
AFFABLE RAP INTERVIEW: "Please. My FATHER is Mr. T. Call me Ice."
ROMANCE: They swapped love notes after church. He thought their love was pure. But when she wrote "XXX" she wasn't referring to kisses.
FABLE: The violinist won the contest, and the devil gave him a golden fiddle. Which is a euphemism for a sex act, because, y’know, the devil.
MEDICAL: The surgery left her hollow and oval. She should never have asked the plastic surgeon to give her a ball-park figure.
MATHS: Facebook Minus Twitter Minus Instagram Plus Your Boss Equals LinkedIn.
MEDICAL: "Look over here. Tell me what you see.” She points at a picture of a half-full glass. Never get your eyes checked by an optimist.
BIBLICAL: The Meek Shall Inherit The Earth, But Won’t Cause A Fuss When The Brash Contest The Will.
MEDICAL: "Look over here. Tell me what you see.” She points at a picture of a half-full glass. Never get your eyes checked by an optimist.
BIBLICAL: The Meek Shall Inherit The Earth, But Won’t Cause A Fuss When The Brash Contest The Will.
PLATITUDE: A poor carpenter blames his tools. A rich carpenter blames excessive taxation and regulation in the carpentry industry.
SCI-FI: In the future, tech will be gesture-based. You’ll play music, change channels, and mail your parents, every time a wasp flies in.
SCI-FI: In the future, tech will be gesture-based. You’ll play music, change channels, and mail your parents, every time a wasp flies in.
FANTASY: Torod-Mur owed fealty to Omon during the Western War. Look, if you’re having trouble following this, imagine I’m having sex on HBO.
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